Chastity
by hhfanx2
Summary: J/L. Oneshot. Warning: This is my ANTIsmut James/Lily fic. If you like smut/R-rated fics, don't flame please!


Chastity

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This is my first attempt at a J/L fic, so please don't flame. I normally write H/Hr! Anyway, I haven't read OotP, though I will be doing that very soon. Thus, we'll call this fic pre-OotP, shall we? Sorry for any mistakes! Well, this is my antismut J/L fic. A-n-t-i. I wrote an antismut H/Hr fic, and I decided to make my first J/L an antismut one, too. Start off with a bang, so to speak. I know, I know James and Lily had to have 'done it' at one point - how else could we have Harry? But I believe they waited until marriage. I hope they did! Now, if you are against ANTIsmut, then go read a fic that's rated R. Please don't flame. Thanks. So, here we go…

"Second base and a half," Peter said as he moved his queen, grinning proudly at what he had just admitted and what he was about to say. "Check."

Sirius, however, didn't notice that he was on the brink of defeat. Or, perhaps he had, but chose not to acknowledge it, for he smiled widely and said, "'Atta boy, Wormtail!" before clapping Peter on the back enthusiastically.

Remus looked up from his book and smiled. "Didn't I call it? I told you she fancied you, Peter."

"Oh, and now you're the resident love expert, Remus?" Sirius asked, grinning devilishly. He turned in his chair to face Remus. "How many lucky ladies have you spent the night with?"

Blushing just a tad, Remus simply said, "A gentleman never tells." Seeing that Sirius was in the process of opening his mouth to protest, Remus quickly and desperately deflected the line of conversation. "James, you faithfully attached man, you! You've been awfully quiet this evening. Pray tell, how goes your, er, physical relationship with the fair maiden we call Lily?"

James was sitting silently on the couch, gently stroking Lily's hair as she slept peacefully with her head in his lap. He had been doing so since Lily had fallen asleep about an hour ago. A smile crept on to his face. "How articulate of you, my friend, but whatever happened to your 'a gentleman never tells' act? You don't mean to say that you're a...a..._hypocrite_, do you?" James teased, feigning a look of horror.

Peter held back a laugh, anticipating Remus' response.

"I said _gentleman_, Prongs. I know I'm one, but you're questionable," Remus said, all in good fun. Then, without even causing Lily to stir in her sleep, James hurled a pillow his way that hit him square in the face. Zing. How could he forget that James was a Chaser?

Laughing, James asked with a mock innocent voice, "Was that gentle enough for you, Moony?" 

Still chuckling, Peter asked James, "Seriously, though, James. Have you and Lily ever--?"

Sirius, Remus, and Peter watched the smile fade from his face. Suddenly, he looked sad and confused. "Uh, I don't think that Lily would fancy that idea much. She's, um, she's very proper and...I wouldn't want her to do anything she doesn't, um, want, nor would I ever want her to feel obliged to, so..." James trailed off uncertainly. He stopped stroking Lily's hair, but instead, he stared into the fireplace.

"I'm sure she would, you know, if the moment was perfect. I mean, you two care very much for one another, so what's wrong with showing it?" Sirius said earnestly.

James said nothing, opting to bite down on his lip instead.

Remus studied James for a moment, before speaking. "James, be honest. Do you _want_ to?"

He pondered the question, long and hard. He could definitely see Lily being his first; there was no doubt about that. And he thought that he probably would enjoy the experience. After all, no one ever spoke badly of it. Would he mind his first time being before marriage, though? He wasn't sure. He wasn't strict with morals - how else could he have pulled off all those Marauder pranks? - but he wasn't terribly loose with them, either. He only knew that his first time had to be extra special. If it were with Lily on their wedding night, that would definitely be special enough. But then again, he knew that it'd be special so long as it was with Lily, regardless of the time and place. After all, he loved Lily very much, with all his heart, mind, body, and soul. But that was precisely what was deterring him from wanting their first time to happen anytime in the near future. He loved her dearly, and if she wanted to wait until marriage, then he'd most certainly comply. He'd never want to force her to do something simply to please him. He'd never hurt her like that… So there. His decision was made, wasn't it?…

"I...I don't know, I...I'm curious, but...no...I don't know..." James mumbled, terribly flustered.

Lying with her head in his lap, Lily felt her eyes water. Still pretending to be asleep, she shifted uneasily, for she had heard everything.

...

The next morning, Remus, Sirius, Peter, James, and Lily sat in the common room. Normally, the Marauders would've been anywhere but the Gryffindor common room on a Saturday like today. However, since they were planning to spend the next day at Hogsmeade, Lily suggested they study for an upcoming Charms test. Surprisingly, even Sirius had agreed.

"Lily can you explain this to me?" Peter asked, pointing to a page in his textbook. 

"Sure," Lily said, leaving her wand on her book as she rose from her seat beside James and walked around the table to where Peter had been studying.

"So, James, did you...?" Remus asked quietly, so as to not attract Lily's attention.

James shook his head. "Couldn't bring up the topic. It's kind of hard, don't you think?"

Remus nodded, showing his understanding. "Oh well, I'm sure you'll get the job done. Don't worry about it."

Suddenly, Sirius groaned. "Ugh! James, could you do me a favour and get that library book I left in your room yesterday?"

"Alright. Where is it?" James asked, rising from his chair and setting his wand and book down. 

Sirius glanced at James' wand before looking up. "Um, I think I left it on the chair by the door. Thanks."

"No problem."

"James? I'll come with you," Lily said. She always liked taking short breaks with James, especially quick walks around the castle.

Turning around, James smiled and said, "Sure." He took her hand in his and waved to the other three. "We'll be back in a jiffy." Then they exited the room.

"Perfect," Sirius said, picking up James' invisibility cloak from his lap.

"Whoa...hold on. Where are you going?" Remus asked.

"And why are you using the cloak in the _morning_?" Peter added.

As he ran to the swinging portrait, Sirius said, "Well, how else can I lock them in James' room without them seeing me follow them?" Then, he was gone.

Peter looked at Remus and shrugged. "They're just going to kill him afterwards, that's all. Nothing to worry about, Moony," he said sarcastically. 

...

James and Lily walked in silence down the hallway, hand in hand. James was still preoccupied with his conversation with the other Marauders the previous night. So was Lily.

She hadn't been able to sleep well because she kept thinking about what she had heard. She was torn. On one hand, she really wanted to save herself for her wedding night. Her mother had told her to do so, and up until last night, Lily had been intent on doing so. But on the other hand, she loved James, and wanted nothing more than for him to be happy. With regards to the degree of intimacy they had in their relationship, Lily thought that James seemed rather sad, or pressured, or jealous, or dissatisfied, or confused, or curious...or perhaps a mixture of all of the above? She didn't know for sure. One thing Lily _was _positive about was that she wanted to relieve him of any uneasiness in any way possible. If that meant giving herself up to James, then...

Lily inhaled sharply.

She'd do it.

...

Under the invisibility cloak, Sirius walked briskly until he caught up with Lily and James just as they reached the Head Students' common room entrance. Lily said the password and the two of them walked inside, not noticing as Sirius slipped in behind them.

"So what book did Sirius leave?" Lily asked as they walked up the stairs to James' room.

James opened the door to his room and stepped in. "I think it was a library book for his Potions essay. He probably left it in here yesterday afternoon when came to borrow the invisibility cloak for a prank."

Following him in, Lily looked at the big chair by the door. "There it is, James," she said, pointing.

Suddenly, they heard the door close, and a spell to lock the door. Both spun around and Lily tried the doorknob. "Hello? Who's there? Let us out!"

"Sorry Lily, but don't worry, it's just me," Sirius called from the other side of the door.

"Sirius? What's going on?" James called, looking for his wand. His heart sank. He had left it on the table. 

"James, there's no need to thank me, really. I'll be on my way now, guys. Have fun. See you later!"

"Wait, Sirius, don't leave! Let us out! We have to study!" Lily called out. She banged on the door.

"Do you have your wand?" James asked. Lily shook her head. "Hello? Sirius, let us out. This isn't funny," he said, banging on the door as Lily stepped back to give him room.

There was no response. Both Lily and James weren't stupid. They knew that Sirius had left already. Sighing, James walked back towards Lily.

Her heart was racing a mile a minute. She had to make her decision _right now_, for this would be her perfect opportunity. She could do it now...

"Lily, are--"

James was interrupted by Lily pulling him forward and placing her hands on both sides of his face, before proceeding to kiss him deeply, intensely. Pleasantly taken by surprise, James complied, kissing her back as he took her in his arms.

As they kissed, Lily made up her mind. Her hands left James' face and started to undo the buttons of his shirt. Trembling slightly, her hands were the only indication of her trepidation.

Immediately, James recognized what was happening. Pulling away, he said softly, "Lily, do you know what you're doing?"

She nodded, continuing to unbutton his shirt, avoiding his gaze all the while. Feeling the weight of his eyes on her, however, Lily began to kiss him again, her fingers now fumbling as she started pulling his shirt off one shoulder.

Once again, he pulled away. "Lily, are you sure?" he asked, taking her hands in his.

Eyes cast downward, she struggled to steady her voice, but to no avail. "Y-y-yes," she stammered.

He knew she was lying. Using one hand to gently lift her chin, James looked Lily in the eye. The fear and uncertainty in her green eyes contradicted what she had just told him.

Busted. Lily silently berated herself for letting her eyes betray her. Feeling James' fingers softly graze her cheek, she closed her eyes and bit her lower lip to stop it from quivering.

"Why?" James simply asked. It was an ambiguous question, but Lily understood perfectly well.

She hesitated. "I...I heard you guys talking yesterday. I just, I wanted you to be happy, James. I'm sorry...I'm sorry, I...I didn't mean to do it wrong. I've never--"

His hug silenced her mid-sentence. His lips gently brushed against her cheek, and he murmured in her ear, "I'm so sorry you had to hear that, Lily. But trust me, I thought it through, and I just want you to be happy. That's what matters most to me. And honestly, deep down, I didn't really want to rush things, either." Taking her hand and leading her to his bed, James sat them down. Putting an arm around Lily to pull her closer, he said, "Thank you for being willing to sacrifice your morals, and yourself, just for me, Lily."

She swiped at her damp eyes and said, "No, James. Thank _you_ for respecting me like you do and have always done." She leaned over and kissed him sweetly. He smiled tenderly at her in return, while brushing away a strand of red hair from her face. Then he reached over to his bedside table, retrieved two textbooks, and placed them on both their laps. "Since we're stuck in here indefinitely," James said, grinning at her, "we might as well study."

Laughing, Lily opened the book. "I love you, James."

"I love you, too."

Then the studying began.

An hour later, both were beginning to nod off. Yawning, James broke the comfortable silence. "You know what, Lily?" He looked at her. "When we're married, we'll be glad we decided what we decided today."

As she blushed, Lily said shyly, "James, it's too premature to talk about getting married!" However, she found she thoroughly enjoyed entertaining that notion in her mind.

"Hmm. No it's not," James said, pulling her near and planting an affectionate kiss on Lily's nose before closing his eyes and leaning back. "You're _so_ Lily Potter, and you'd better like it."

Seeing the smile on his face greatly warmed her heart. Then she followed suit and closed her eyes, leaning on James' shoulder. Lily counted to ten, and, for a moment, thought that their breathing was synchronized. But she was too tired to give it any more thought.

...

Professor McGonagall came out of the Gryffindor common room, wondering where James and Lily were. She swiftly made her way to the Head Students' common room, and walked up the flight of stairs leading to Lily's room. Knocking on the door softly and receiving no answer, McGonagall turned the doorknob.

"Miss Evans?"

The bed was made, the washroom door was slightly ajar, and the silent room was still and lifeless. Turning around and closing the door behind her, McGonagall went up the opposite flight of stairs. Before she knocked on James' door, she was interrupted by loud knocking from outside the common room. Hurrying to see who the source of noise was, she found herself face to face with Sirius, Remus, and Peter.

"What are you three doing here?"

"Well, you see, we were just wondering the same about you, Professor," Sirius said innocently.

"I'm looking for Miss Evans and Mr. Potter, Mr. Black. You asked me not five minutes ago in the Gryffindor common room."

"Um, well, you see, James and Lily are up there in his room. Getting a book for me."

"Very well then," McGonagall said, wondering why he hadn't simply told her back in the other common room. Going up the stairs again, Sirius interrupted her.

"Wait! Professor? I think--"

She ignored him, and knocked softly. No response. Turning the doorknob, she found it locked. "What is the meaning of this, Mr. Black? You don't play a role in the locking of Mr. Potter's door, do you? Is that why you're here?" She muttered the spell to unlock the door, before turning to Sirius.

"Actually...I did lock the door, but in Lily and James' best interests, I assure you, Professor," he said, attempting to sound convincing. Clearing his throat, Sirius said, "I wouldn't walk in on them unannounced...er, just in case of, um...uh..."

McGonagall opened the door (while Sirius, Remus, and Peter crossed their fingers in hopes that James and Lily were decent) and to everyone's surprise and relief, there were the Head Boy and Girl, on his bed, indeed. Fully clothed, books open, sitting upright, and fast asleep.

Exhaling a collective sigh of relief with Sirius and Peter, Remus finally spoke since entering the Head Students' common room. "I think what Sirius meant to say, Professor, was that we shouldn't walk in on them unannounced, just in case they were sleeping. Um...we wouldn't want to wake them, would we?"

Eyeing Sirius suspiciously, McGonagall said quietly to Remus, "Of course not. I'll just leave them a note in the common room." She herded the three boys down the stairs after closing James' door. "But I hope this will be the last time I catch you locking the Head Students in their rooms, Mr. Black. They have important duties to perform. Even on Saturday. Understand?" she said, while quickly scrawling a note.

"Yes, of course, Professor." Sirius watched her leave. "Duties! Yes, very important!" he called out. When she was gone, he turned to Peter and Remus, shaking his head. "Why were they STUDYING?! Of all things to do in a locked room! Ugh! I risked my good reputation and look at them! Sleeping with books open on their laps!? My plans, all ruined!" 

Remus smirked, shaking his head like Sirius was a lost cause.

Peter laughed. "You're an idiot, Sirius, you know that?"

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Author's Note: There we go. Yay! Chastity. ANTIsmut. Hurray! 17 year olds shouldn't be intimate in that way. That's my opinion, of course. You're welcome to have your own. And you're most certainly welcome to write your own fic to express that opinion. Thanks for reading. No flames, please. I'm terribly sensitive. Haha.


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